Adam and I have been together for four years. We’ve handled planting seasons and harvest seasons before. This year though, we got married. Being married and going through harvest is different from long-distance dating. These are just 4 things that have taken on new meanings.
Meals are Tricky
Steps away from my college home, I had the access to food. Meals were whichever fast food was open at the time, or what 24-hour grocery store I wanted to go to. I never had to plan more than one meal ahead, if that. Now… I have to plan out the next month! Harvest means 2 extra loaves of bread, 3 extra sandwich meat packages, and the BIG blocks of pre-cut cheeses. But, those are just his lunches. Supper is a different story. I try to plan a meal that will be good at 5:00 pm and still good warmed up at 11:00 pm.
Buddy Seats make Dates
If I’m being honest, I don’t have a lot of patience. I usually like being the one doing something! So, the idea of just sitting there while auto-steer does its stuff was not very appealing. But I actually love it! This is my husband’s favorite place to be (unless the header keeps breaking). We get to talk while still being productive and not once do we reach for our phones.
Crushing on your Roommate
Combining has changed the feeling of our marriage. There are many nights I am asleep before he gets in from the field. I don’t get the ask him how his day was. So I make the joke that I now have a roommate that I share a bed with. It takes a unique toll on our relationship that many others understand. He is still my husband. I still sneak sleepy kisses when he does finally come to bed. It just takes more effort on my part, and that is something I knew when I signed up for this gig.
Support takes a different Definition
So although I rarely see my farmer, my house sure knows he is there! He’s a roommate that doesn’t have the time to thoroughly clean the house but, still has enough to time to dirty it when he is home. I am by no means June Cleaver, I don’t pretend to be an adoring housewife. But the work still needs to be done. I want to get mad. I want to tell him he isn’t pulling his weight, but that’s not marriage. Our marriage is built on a lot of support. He loves farming! His love for farming comes at a cost that I have to be willing to cover. That’s cleaning things he makes dirty, making meals I won’t ever eat, getting parts for something I don’t own, and trying to find a field that looks like every other field, just to spend time with him.
Sacrifice, support, and coffee. That’s the real key to a successful marriage. To all the farmers, Happy Harvest.
As always, be kind.